My Paper

Well, here it is. Five pages of something slightly above mediocrity. I really wish that I would start papers sooner, but there's something about an impending deadline that just gets my creative and literary juices flowing.


I once had a discussion with a friend of mine who just so happened to be an atheist. I wasn’t bothered by him not believing in my God, or even any god at all. What angered me about the discussion was his nearsightedness of the whole situation. He’d been asking me questions all afternoon about creation and, “Why did God create dinosaurs before humans,” and, “why does the Bible lie and say people lived to be over 100 years old?” My response to most of these situations is along the lines of, “I don’t know, but God knows. I just leave it at that.” I also use the, “I am that I am,” explanation Moses gets. However, his reasoning for not believing in a god is almost irrefutable. He claims that he could never believe in any god that allowed young women to be raped, loving homes to be robbed, and innocent cities to be bombed. “Why does your ‘almighty God’ let these bad things happen to good people? And why should I have to follow this God when he’s the one who put me on this planet to suffer throughout my life and then just die?” The thing is, as much as I want to answer him, and maybe strike him down myself, I can’t come up with a legitimate reason.
How can I even begin to know the reasons behind the acts of God? Who am I to make a guess as to what an almighty being is thinking and planning? I don’t even care to study the politics of my home state, much less look into the operations of the entire universe. There are many people who feel the same way as I do, and there are many people who are tortured by not knowing. A person would think that a world created and ran by a perfect being would, in turn, be perfect itself. The good would be rewarded, and the wicked would be punished. Everyone knows that this is not always the case, and bad things are constantly happening to good people. I have seen this happen countless times throughout my life, and I’m sure these occurrences won’t slow down over time. To illustrate what I’m trying to say, I’d like to use a fiction novel. Even though the story may be true, the themes and morals can relate to anyone.
When I read Isaac Bashevis Singer’s “The Slave,” I became enthralled with Jacob’s journey. His unwavering faith in God is something that I became jealous of during the course of my reading, and I wished that I could be more like him. However, the more I read into the story, (and re-read), the more I found out how alike we are. Both of us fail to understand exactly why God must make people suffer. “Why had God created the world? Why had He found it necessary to have pain, sin, and evil?... An all-powerful Creator did not need to be sustained by the agony of small children and the sacrifice of His people to bands of assassins,” (54). I share these same thoughts with Jacob, though I don’t necessarily focus on the sufferings of Josefov. These feelings plague Jacob continuously; his soul is being constantly tested and tortured. Not only does Jacob have these views, he also serves and worships the same god that is posing these questions to him. Why would Jacob worship the being that causes all this suffering? To answer quite briefly and completely, Jacob, and I, are slaves.
Now that I’ve come to terms with my indentured servitude to God, (which I’m maybe starting to have a problem with), why does God insist on mistreating his servants? Rather than focus on me, since I realize I’ve definitely done bad things in my life that have warranted punishment, I’d rather explore the sufferings and pitfalls of Jacob’s seemingly God-fearing life. I understand completely when murderers are sent to prison, but what I don’t fail to comprehend is why the church-going, God-fearing, upstanding community member in Kansas gets his home completely destroyed by a tornado. An occurrence like that can’t even be attributed to another wicked person; it is God’s direct doing and handiwork. So, when Jacob’s family is killed in the murdering of Josefov and he’s eventually sold into slavery, I begin to wonder why on God’s green earth would God do something like this.
I used to think it was wrong to question God; that unwittingly following him was the right way to go about life. After a close reading of the book of Job, I begin to feel the opposite. Learning from the attitude of Job in the middle of the story, I can see why Jacob would want a few questions of his own answered. Jacob has led a good life in the eyes of God: he’s studied the holy books, taught boys in the church, married a Jewish woman, had children, and made a good life for himself. When all of this is taken away from him and he finds himself in the service of Jan Bzik, he still maintains as much of a Jewish lifestyle as he can. Does God grant him reprieve and take him up to heaven? No, of course he doesn’t. In fact, it is my belief that God has pulled an anti-pharaoh on the town’s leader, Zagayek. Rather than just kill the Jew, as most of the town asks and pleads Zagayek to do, he refuses. Why doesn’t he kill Jacob? Maybe his heart has been softened by the Lord God rather than stiffened. Since Singer offers no other explanation as to why Zagayek lets Jacob live, I’m going to assume that it is God’s direct influence keeping Jacob among the mortal, evil world.
If you distance yourself from the situation, not dying can’t be perceived as such a bad thing. Generally, the goal of most people on earth is to live and procreate. Looking at Jacob’s story from this point of view, I think I can accept God’s decision to let Jacob live. But, just as I find a way to justify God’s actions, he sends the temptress Wanda up the mountain to see if she can get Jacob to shirk his Jewish duties. This, to me, is one of the most devilish things I’ve ever heard God do to one soul. Being a male myself, it is hard to imagine having to refuse a beautiful woman while enslaved in a mountain village, especially if that woman is your owner’s daughter! Not only that, but the townspeople offer him full citizenship, a tract of land, and Wanda’s hand in marriage if only he’d renounce his Jewish faith. I believe that this would be the point where Jacob and I would cease being similar. Sorry God, but if you’re going to allow Satan to tempt me like this, then I think we should see other people.
It’s around this point in the story that I found what could be an answer to my original question of why does God do what he does. In this particular moment that I’m looking at, Jacob is answering some of Wanda’s questions about God and the world. Jacob opens the section with a short monologue about the creation of the world and the purpose of all that God does. “So that the world might appear, it had been necessary for Him to dim is effulgence. Had He not done this, whatever He created would have been consumed and blinded by His brilliance. Darkness and the void had been required, and these were synonymous with pain and evil,” (82). In this section, Jacob also mentions that God had to create his children in order to show them pity, redeem them, and father them. However, in order for there to be redemption, there must also be damnation, and maybe that’s why God continues to make his children suffer. He goes on to say that the purpose of creation was to form free will, and allow man to choose between good and evil for himself. What I get from this is that God created the world from the void to give us the gift of free will; yet, in order for creation to exist, there had to be some of the void left over. There had to be a darkness to absorb some of God’s light or we’d all perish in His brilliance. This seems like a fair enough reason to cause the world suffering, but why can’t God just make the evil people of the world suffer and leave his faithful slaves in peace? I seems I have still not come to an answer for my question. I guess I’ll have to turn back to Jacob to see if I can come up with a solution.
As much as I hate to read about Jacob suffering, this is, by far, my most favorite part of the book. In the face of all these temptations and offerings of the devil, Jacob refuses to lose his faith. Yes, he does eventually lie with Wanda, but how long did God expect him to resist? He had been stuck on a mountain gathering grass for cattle for four years! The part of this story that fills me with hope is after he lies with Wanda, he continues his Jewish traditions, even though he believes he has forfeited the world to come. He maintains his faith, and justifies his rituals by proclaiming: “Well, but I am still a Jew,” (70). His faith remains rock-solid. Even after all the losses he’s experienced, the slavery, and the temptation, Jacob still has faith in his God and remains a faithful servant. I can’t even begin to comprehend the fortitude of this man.
At this point in The Slave, I’m reminded of a story in the New Testament of the Bible. I know Jacob can’t relate to it himself, but I can do it for him. This particular parable can be found in the book of Luke 10: 38-42. There are two sisters in the setting, Mary and Martha. While Mary listens intently to everything Jesus has to say, Martha is bustling around the house, distracted by her, “many tasks.” When Martha confronts Jesus about the idleness of her sister, Jesus responds: “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.” What Jesus is speaking of, (at least what I believe he’s speaking of), is Mary’s faith in the Lord God.
Even though Jews don’t believe in Jesus, I’m sure they could both agree on this solid piece of advice. That is why Jacob’s faith is so strong: it is his one thing. That’s all he needs and that’s all he cares about. What God does to him doesn’t matter as long as Jacob has his faith. His religion encompasses his entire lifestyle, and if he believes in it enough and focuses all his energies on it, then whatever else happens to him is inconsequential. Perhaps it is God who has made Jacob’s faith strong enough to cope with these misfortunes and tribulations. Perhaps He really does have a plan. If Jacob can believe this after all he’s been through, then so can I.
My atheist friend may not accept this explanation, but I no longer care what he thinks or what he’s trying to make me think. As a proud Lutheran, my faith is powerful, and has guided me through many hard times in my life. Though it may not be my “one thing” as of yet, I hope for it to be someday. I feel that it is right to sometimes question God. I believe questioning Him comes with the free will part of the creation deal. However, the answer my friend and I seek will never be visible to us in this world. Right now, all I can do is wait it out and have faith in my God as Jacob does.


There you have it. Hope it wasn't too bad!